Right. I know. Believe me. I don’t want to talk about it either, especially after finishing off a 6-serving bag of nut clusters all by myself less than an hour ago. But the simple fact of the matter is this: Summer in Alabama is upon us, and that means hot weather and smaller clothing. Shorts, sleeveless tops and, as frightening as it may seem, swimsuits. But hold on, I have some relatively good news. You may have heard of Jillian Michaels. She is that tough trainer from NBC’s Biggest Loser. She is truly a crazy person, but she does claim to have a 30-day solution. Jillian Michael’s 30 Day Shred. When I read all the stellar reviews about how people were seeing results within a few days, I was skeptical. When I discovered that her’s was the number one selling DVD in the Country, I thought it was a passing fad. But, like most money-sucking trends, I instinctively had to have it immediately. However, before you balk, I knew the very first time I worked out with Jillie (we’re BFFs now, BTW), that she was onto something.
I am on day 15, my third week (you have to do it five times a week, so 30 days is really 6 week). And there’s this very strange and unfamiliar hardness just beneath my mushiness. Intriguing. I think I might hang around and see what happens in the next 15 workouts. Even though she terrifies me (but is still my new best friend), I think it may be working. But be warned. Girl is not playing around. There is one segment in Level Two of the workout when I consistently think, this is the end! My face is a sweaty shade of deep purple, and I can’t seem to adequately inflate either one of my lungs. And I huff out the words, “I am dy-ing!” And, right at that very second, Jillian looks at the camera and barks out, “I. Want. You. To. Feel. Like. You. Are. Going. To. DIE!” I wheez back at her, “I do. I do!” And then I scream out an expletive that makes me feel better, and worse, at the same time.
Now, while she and I will never see eye-to-eye about those butchy chinos/capris she’s sporting during in the Level Two section of the DVD, I will give her props. She may be on to something. Her philosophy/mission is to force the body to adapt under duress and therefore take a new form. Sounds miserable, I know. But the consoling part is, it’s 20 minutes. That’s nothing! So you don’t dread it all that much. Because you know as well as I do, you can do just about anything for twenty minutes. So come on. I dare you! Order it today, and let us know what you think.
Now, where did I set down that Pepperidge Farm milk chocolate macadamia nut cookie?